The Burden of Self

Individuality. It means undivided self. It means You. It means there’s somebody in your head telling you to things to help You define yourself as “You”.

It has other name, it’s called Ego. This ego is essentially selfish. Sometimes it make others hurt. Even more, it’s the sole reason how You can feel hurt in the first place.

It’s one of the first burden every human being hold since their birth. It is as if You have a black hole in your soul driving You to do things simply to please yourself.

It’s addictive. The more you please it, the more it gets heavier. Up to a point where you can’t hold it anymore and it becomes a self-destructive (or worse, destructive) drive. Everything you do is simply means to sate your desire. It strips the peace out of You.

Those are the symptoms how unbridled Ego lord itself above your conscience as a Man. It’s not entirely bad, as it is one of the reasons why this world is so colourful and worth living. But Man’s basic desire is animalistic, is carnally selfish. Left unbound without discipline, You are not much different than animal.

The only way to balance that, is to share that burden of Individuality with anything / anyone external. If not, it will render things unstable. Self is not a bearable by one.

That is all why I chose to believe in Jesus Christ as my saviour. The more I try harder to hold that burden called “Self”, the more I feel overweighed. Then He says:

Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.

– Matthew 11:28, ESV2011

That’s it! I personally feel that the more I do things for myself, the more I feel empty and listless. And yet the more I do things for Him alone or others selflessly,the more  I feel lighter! It’s just a form peace unlike peace I ever feel before.

The journey with Him is worth it. The journey makes the destination worthwile and the destination also makes the journey worthwhile. Both the journey and the destination is Heaven.

In the wake of my struggle as that selfish Man, He is beside me and waiting until I’m done to embrace me. He’s making me more than just a Man. He’s making me into a Heavenly Man. It’s a lifelong process.

Question is, you who are tired and burdensome, do you want to feel lighter? He is always open to hold your Burden of Self.


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